For the friends in my life

Some of my more recent posts talk about feeling alone, having a hard time relating to people and some not so steady friends drifting away. I wanted to correct any misunderstanding that some may feel and give due thanks where it should be said. I was already plotting this out in my head when a few more friends and people that I know have said or done some pretty freaking amazing things for me. So now this post is just overdue…

I’ve a lot of friends and family that have drifted out of my life, stopped wanting to be part of my life or just plain ignore me. But there are others who have really made life still worth it.

I know it’s easier for most people to not deal with the impossible of my reality and I don’t find fault in that, even if I feel personally hurt by the withdraw. I am sometimes impossible to be around, not very sociable, don’t accept help very well not to mention the years I’ve been stuck in a place of probably needing help so what help I do accept I fear some think it’s not noticed or that I am thankful. So it makes those who continually weather out my life all the more important to me.

Most of you know about Lorien and how her friendship has really kept me afloat. Her mother Barbara has also been irreplaceable. I’ve friends scattered all over who have supported me, called me, write to me and still help me in any way possible even though I am difficult. Amy has been a gods-send. The Phillips family just amazing. Quite a few Coyote Tracks and Tracker people have really stuck with me. Quite a few of my parents friends around the country are really amazing and helpful. Eileen and Vincent who have had me stay with them multiple times to name a few names. Friends in Tennessee and a few newer friends in Alaska and other states have really touched me. And then there are the people who started out as clients with horses and dogs who befriend me and are incredibly generous to me. Even my physical therapist decided I was worth knowing. Saying thank you never seems like quite enough. I probably couldn’t get all the names I should have written down for those who have done something for me over the years. The ones I feel humbled by are those who even after years of me still count me as someone important to them. Words are hard to come by.

And for my family, words are also hard to come by for many.

I have some great people around the world even when I feel most alone, I am thankful for you all.

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3 thoughts on “For the friends in my life

  1. I may be all the way in MD but I am most definitely here, and keeping up with your blog. I understand many of your writings and feelings through dealing with my own tragedies. I understand not wanting to talk to people at times, and not wanting to be around people. I, too, have had friends drift away because of my chosen career path in the emergency field and the tragedies I have seen there and in my personal life. I don’t trust many people and I don’t let many people get close to me. I think that if we were able to live closer or visit more, we would be great friends. However, I have always considered you a friend, someone who is similar to myself in many ways, and I am always thinking of you and your family. I am here if you need anything, want to talk, write, whatever.

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